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Lewis Black ... Black Is Beautiful

I will, at this time, freely admit that I worship at the alter of Lewis Black. Okay…I don’t literally worship him, but I do deeply love him. Lewis is acidic, sarcastic, cynical, and consistently on the mark. He tells it like it is and lets no one get away with what can only be referred to as bovine fecal matter..

Lewis is a fearless commentator on society and world issues. In a perfect world I’d make him the leader of the free world. He calls leaders on the carpet for their retarded nonsense and keeps us in stitches while doing it. He is the only comedian I have ever watched that actually made the topic of the weather something funny.He has a habit of being honest and merciless, which I find refreshing. He is difficult to describe…so I will let you see for yourself. Check out the quotes…or better yet, order his Books or DVDs. I personally loved watching Lewis Black: Red, White and Screwed the most, but I appreciated it more after having seen and/or listened to his other performances.

QUOTES

Let's face it, Americans are fat all year round, but the holidays are when we really hit our stride. And you can bet the food we eat will be just as unhealthy as the families we're forced to visit.
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The last person to get across that town in under three hours was yelling "The British are coming! The British are coming!" [On Boston traffic]

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Turns out we've all been eating the wrong thing...since the dawn of civilization! [On the Atkins Diet]

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But those aren't the flavors. That'd make too much sense. Apple and pear, according to Dr. Phil, are body types the bars are made for. Hey, I've got some advice. If you look like an apple or a pear, eat an apple or a pear! [On Dr. Phil's energy bars]

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Candy Corn is the only candy in the history of America that's never been advertised. And there's a reason. All of the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.

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MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken!

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You don't want another Enron? Here's your law: If a company, can't explain, in ONE SENTENCE....what it does....it's illegal.

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Behind me, I heard a young woman of 25 say, "If it weren’t for my horse, I wouldn’t have spent that year in college." Now, I'm gonna repeat that, because it bears repeating. "If it weren't for my horse..." as in, giddyup, giddyup, let's go — "I wouldn't have spent that year in college," which is a degree-granting institution. Don't think about that too long, or BLOOD will shoot out your nose!
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The Republicans are the party of bad ideas. The Democrats are the party of no ideas.
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In my lifetime, we've gone from Eisenhower to George W. Bush. We've gone from John F. Kennedy to Al Gore. If this is evolution, I believe that in 12 years, we'll be voting for plants.
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I do have certain feelings. My feeling is that whoever is in charge, I want him out. (on his political views)
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Here are some links to Lewis' CDs, DVDs and Books to get you going... as you can see, there is no shortage of entertainment from the mighty man in black.

Man Of The Year - Robin Williams, Lewis Black

Man Of The Year

Starring: ROBIN WILLIAMS, CHRISTOPHER WALKEN, LAURA LINNEY, LEWIS BLACK

Genre: COMEDY/DRAMA

In light of the up and coming inauguration of Barack Obama, not to mention the perpetual pistol-whipping over the head by the sensationalist psychos known as the media, I suppose that it is only natural that my mind has turned to the grand arena of incompetence that we call "politics". I started thinking about the political movies I have seen over the years. Given my general disdain of politicians in reality, I found myself pleasantly surprised that some of the best movies I have seen were about the leaders of the world. This posting is to be the first in a small series of movie reviews regarding politicians and leadership. So let's just go ahead and start with Man Of The Year.

Man Of The Year looked promising when I saw the previews for the theatrical release, but I was reluctant to go see it. Much as I love Robin Williams, and I positively worship at the alter of Lewis Black, I was still worried that the movie would be heavy handed in the whole political ethics department. “Political Ethics”…now THAT is an oxymoron. But, I digress.

Now that the movie is out on DVD, I took it upon myself to watch it, and did my best to keep my expectations in check. It was the damnedest thing. When I wasn’t looking, I found myself enjoying the movie.

The premise of this flick is simple. A Jon Stewart-esque comedian who does the fake news, runs for president as an independent candidate. He makes a good enough showing to be added the ticket, and whaddya know? He wins the presidency. The first presidential election where all votes were placed electronically on a computer system, and a comedian wins. Can you guess how that happened? That’s right…a computer glitch. Enter Laura Linney's character, who works for the software company that wrote the program. She discovered the glitch before election day and told her boss, who promptly had her drugged, causing her to flip out in the company cafeteria and it lands her in the hospital. This was the one portion of the movie where they jumped the shark…just a little bit…because let’s face it, something that big…people will kill over it…and would have killed her in a heartbeat.

Naturally, no one believes our heroine, except for the new President Elect played by Robin Williams. So, what is the right thing to do? As the President, he could make the changes that American’s have been asking for. He hasn’t been bought out by special interest groups, he is not tied down by party loyalty, and he genuinely wants to make things better. But the problem is ... he wasn’t elected. And he knows it.

First and foremost, he’s an American and a patriot. So, the question becomes, “Is it right to go ahead and be the leader of the free world and take a shot at making a real difference, or do you speak up because as an American, you don’t screw with the voting process, because then it would no longer be a government by the people, for the people?” Then, of course, there is always the little matter of having proof of the flub. It’s what happens when the government gets involved with big business.

Yes, this is a morality tale. It gently nudges you towards the ramifications of the actions of the people in power. Their hubris is infinite…and will be to their and our own detriment. This movie is worthy of note. It’s not too heavy handed and it encourages you to take a moment and truly look at the people in power, to speak out and be heard, and to do whatever needs to be done to make the government what it was always supposed to be, but has not been for a very long time…a government by the people, for the people. Forget about the “issues” like gay marriage and focus on the things that matter, like the education crisis in our country. Alright. I will get off of my soapbox now.

I give this movie 3 out of 5 stars, for its morality and humor, but it did drag a little in places. It’s watchable, and it points out that it would behoove our leaders to take note of what the people truly want. It would also behoove our citizens to take note of what our “leaders” are doing. This is an educational movie as well as entertaining, and I do think it should be shown in political science and philosophy classrooms all across the country. If nothing else, it is an excellent conversation starter.

Religion...What's been Said Thus far....Something to think about

Take on Religion

NOTE: This is a list of quotes from all kinds of perspectives from multiple people. There is something here for almost everyone…please understand that the intent here is to just show what different people think. I am in no way saying that any of these are right or wrong, I just happen to find them interesting.

Dane Cook – “I was riding in an elevator and this guy got on with me, and as we are riding this guy sneezed…..after a second I looked at him and said, “Uh, God bless you,” but I said it with a tone that said “Cover your &*%$#!@ mouth”….now I said “God bless you” and not just “bless you” because, I’m not the Lord. I don’t have that kind of power.” So anyway, this guy looks at me like I’m garbage and says “I’m an atheist”. So I asked him, “What is it that you believe?” He says, well, I believe that when I die, I will be returned to the earth and make the ground fertile, and then some day a tree will take root and grow from that soil and I will become a beautiful tree.” And here is what I think of that…ok, you grow into a tree….then one day some big burly lumberjack comes along and chops down the tree, and it goes to the mill where they put that tree into grinder….eventually he becomes paper, and once he becomes paper….WE PRINT THE BIBLE ON HIM.”


Jim Gaffigan – “I like for everyone to feel comfortable, which is why I want to talk to you about Jesus…(and you’re all thinking) he better not! Wouldn’t it be awful if I got struck by lightening for that? The next day you’d be telling your friends, “He told a Jesus joke and got electrocuted. It was the BEST show I’ve ever seen”.”

Jim Gaffigan - Where did we get our ideas for celebrating Easter? Can you imagine…?

Person 1: “Hey, Easter is coming, the day the Lord was raised from the dead. What should we do?
Person 2: How about eggs?
Person 1: What does that have to do with Jesus?
Person 2: (Shrugging) All right, we’ll hide them.
Person 1: I don’t follow your logic.
Person 2: Oh, don’t worry. There’s a bunny.

Marc Maron: “…He died young, so he never really got the chance to become bitter. Suppose he hadn’t died young…let’s say there was a third testament to the Bible. Jesus is about 50 or 60 years old, he’s got one apostle left, the book would open with Jesus standing knee deep in water and yelling back at the shore to his one apostle “I USED TO BE ABLE TO DO THIS!!”

Lewis Black Live -Every Sunday, I turn on the TV and there is always a preacher reading from the Old Testament, which is the book of my people….the Jewish people. And that book, wasn’t good enough for you Christians…was it? You said “No! We have a better book with a better character, you’re gonna love him!!!” But every Sunday there is a preacher reading from my book, and interpreting it. And their interpretations, I have to tell you, are usually wrong. You don’t see Rabbis on TV interpreting the New Testament, do you?--

"God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh." --Voltaire "

"If Jesus came back and saw what was being done in his name, he wouldn't be able to stop throwing up." Woody Allen, American comedian (born 1935)

With all of the scandals surrounding televangelists, they have decided that they need to come up with a new code of ethics for the televangelists. I thought the they had a code of ethics. It’s called the Bible! What ever happened to that? Do we really need to write down “Thou shalt not play the pirate and the slave girl in cheap motel rooms”? -Jay Leno, 1988.

They say that God is everywhere, and yet we always think of Him as somewhat of a recluse. -Emily Dickinson, poet (1830-1886)

Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods. -Albert EinsteinGod is subtle, but he is not malicious. -Albert Einstein.

Whenever morality is based on theology, whenever right is made dependent on divine authority, the most immoral, unjust, infamous things can be justified and established. -Ludwig Feuerbach, philosopher (1804-1872)

You can safely assume that you've created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do. -Anne Lamott, writer (1954- )

My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed. -Christopher Morley, writer (1890-1957)

Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from religious conviction. -Blaise Pascal, philosopher and mathematician (1623-1662)

When people are fanatically dedicated to political or religious faiths or any other kind of dogmas or goals, it's always because these dogmas or goals are in doubt. -Robert T. Pirsig, author and philosopher (1928- )Pray to God, but keep rowing to shore. -- Russian Proverb

Lord, grant that we may always be in the right, for thou knowest we will never change our minds- Scottish prayer

If you talk to God, you are praying. If God talks to you, you have schizophrenia. -- Thomas Szasz

Businesses may come and go, but religion will last forever, for in no other endeavor does the consumer blame himself for product failure. (author unknown)

Black holes are where God divided by zero. – Steven Wright

All religions must be tolerated... for... every man must get to heaven his own way. ~Frederick the Great

God made so many different kinds of people. Why would he allow only one way to serve him? ~Martin Buber

There is only one religion, though there are a hundred versions of it. ~George Bernard Shaw

I still say a church steeple with a lightning rod on top shows a lack of confidence. ~Doug McLeod

I believe in God; I just don't trust anyone who works for him. ~Author unknown, from a stand-up comedy routine on television

Philosophy is questions that may never be answered. Religion is answers that may never be questioned. ~Author Unknown

In some awful, strange, paradoxical way, atheists tend to take religion more seriously than the practitioners. ~Jonathon Miller

If a kid asks where rain comes from, I think a cute thing to tell him is "God is crying." And if he asks why God is crying, another cute thing to tell him is, "Probably because of something you did." ~Saturday Night Live, Jack Handey, "Deep Thoughts”

Impiety, n.: Your irreverence toward my deity. ~Ambrose Bierce


Geology shows that fossils are of different ages. Paleontology shows a fossil sequence, the list of species represented changes through time. Taxonomy shows biological relationships among species. Evolution is the explanation that threads it all together. Creationism is the practice of squeezing one's eyes shut and wailing "Does not!" ~Author Unknown

I am treated as evil by people who claim that they are being oppressed because they are not allowed to force me to practice what they do. ~D. Dale Gulledge

The wages of sin are death, but after they take the taxes out, it's more like a tired feeling, really. ~Paula Poundstone

Christ died for our sins. Dare we make his martyrdom meaningless by not committing them? ~Jules Feiffer

And we have saved the best for last…

Christianity might be a good thing if anyone ever tried it. ~George Bernard Shaw

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